What in the H*ll is that Smell?

So, I try to mostly drive Chato's work car. This keeps the mileage off our car and the money in our pockets. So, last week I didn't drive my car for like four or five days. Yesterday, I go to get in my car and am astounded by this god awful smell. Immediately I think old sippy cup of milk. All Moms know that stench and it is horrific. This was worse. I look under all the seats, start sniffing like a basset hound.. nada. It smells but no culprit to be found.

I roll the windows down and drive down the street. Somehow the smell is getting worse. How can fresh air be making it worse? But it is. I retreat. Something dead must be under my car. I call Chato out. He looks under the hood and under the car nothing. Next, I pop the trunk. We both take several steps back and cover our mouths. Literally, the stench knocks us back. Chato looks at me ans says, "I can't."

Fearful, he might pass out or puke, I head in. After a second I find that I have left a grocery bag in the car which was hidden by soccer stuff. Inside the bag was previously frozen chicken breasts. Something already dead was decomposing in my car. It was horrible. My car has been airing out for two days. Can I please have a minivan now?